Raising Great Kids Blog

From the moment a mother conceives there is an undeniable bond created and from that moment a mother will do all in her power to love and protect her baby.

A friend of mine, who recently found out she was pregnant for the first time, has written some beautiful words about a mother’s love for her unborn child.  You can read them here.

The need to protect…

While raising great kids, the absolute need to protect our children is amazingly strong.  We protect them from all sorts of potential danger.  When they are very young we do all we can to protect them from drowning, serious falls, burns, choking, getting sick and even against starvation.

As they grow our need to protect them doesn’t waver.   Any parent who has had a child in hospital because of sickness or injury will tell you they would gladly trade places with them if they could.  To see your own child suffering has got to be one of the hardest things a parent has to do.  It’s all consuming and at that time nothing else matters except the well-being of your child.

But …

Yes, there is a but.  While raising great kids, there are many times when you have to learn to let go.  And I’m the first to admit it hasn’t always been easy for me.

I remember…

…the first time my eldest son cycled to school – on his own – without my protection.

It wasn’t as if he wasn’t prepared.  I’d been cycling to school with him every Friday (weather permitting) for years.  So when he started High School, which was right next to his old Primary School, there was no reason why he shouldn’t be allowed to cycle the 5 kilometres by himself.

Plenty of other kids were doing it and it was mostly on pavements.  He’d proved to me numerous times he knew how to safely navigate the two roundabouts and to always be on the lookout for cars backing out of driveways.  He knew to look and listen constantly and go slowly through the group of people at the bus stop.  And he knew to be extra careful cycling passed two ‘blind’ driveways.

So why did I feel physically sick the first day he did it?  I knew the cycle to school would take no more than 20 minutes, but it was only when I hadn’t heard anything from anybody (police, school, etc) for about an hour that I finally started to relax and accept he’d got to school safely.

Of course I started feeling sick again around 3 o’clock in the afternoon when I knew he’d be getting ready to cycle home.  When I heard the side gate being opened and knew he’d got home safely I managed to quickly pull myself together and welcome him home.

The days became weeks and the weeks became months, and slowly but surely I began to comfortably accept that my son was perfectly capable of getting to and from school safely – on his own – without my protection.  I finally learned to let go.

By the way…

I went through exactly the same scenario three years later with my younger son.

Just one of many

Of course, the cycling to school story is just one of many situations where I’ve had to learn to let go while raising great kids.  Over the years there have been numerous times, even when my boys were young.  Think about the first time you left your precious baby with a non-family member baby-sitter.  Or your child’s first day at school.  Or their first sleep-over at a friend’s place.  These were like mini letting goes, to prepare you for the bigger stuff ahead.

I recall the first time my son wanted to go surfing, just with his mates – and when he celebrated New Year’s Eve in the City, watching the Harbour Bridge fireworks, with his mates.  Driving by himself after passing his driving test.  Flying to Queensland with his mates on a surfing holiday.  And even now at 18, going to parties, pubs and clubs.

It does get easier

I know I’ve come a long because my eldest son is currently at the snow with his mates and I’m confident and comfortable that he’ll be happy, healthy and safe.

Raising Great Kids – Letting Go

It’s been my experience that a wonderful thing happens to your kids as you gradually learn to let go.  They become happy individuals, able to confidently and comfortably stand on their own two feet and take on whatever life has to offer.

As parents it’s what we want – isn’t it?

What has been your experience of letting go?

I always love to receive your comments, so let me know what your thoughts are on raising great kids and letting go.

Jan Littlehales

Tweet

Share

1 save

Living on the northern beaches of Sydney I visit the beach regularly, although these days it’s often just my husband and me.  My husband usually goes for a surf and I go for a long walk on the beach.  But this post isn’t about walking – you already know I love to do that from my previous post – this post is about building sandcastles.

Some Things Never Change

While our teenage boys might head to the beach by themselves these days, some things never change.  Visit almost any beach on the northern beaches of Sydney, any time of the year, and there are mums and dads raising great kids and building sandcastles… although, I’ll admit it is usually the dads who get more involved.  Kids just seem to love it.  I bet it’s the same at your local beaches.

The Simple Things are Often the Best

Building sandcastles can be as simple as a couple of upturned buckets of sand with lollipop sticks stuck in the top, to sophisticated creations with spirals and moats.  Just last weekend on Manly Beach I saw the Egyptian Pyramids and a Sphinx made out of sand – along with a couple of great kids and their parents looking very proud of themselves.

But whatever you make, the simple pleasure of spending a morning or afternoon on the beach with your kids and creating something out of sand has got to be a top way of raising great kids.

But you have to help

Have you noticed that when kids are young they love to build sandcastles – but only if you help.  It’s not just about them building sandcastle, it’s about them spending time with you.  Kids just love it when you engage with them.  As they get older they might be happy to build sandcastles on their own, but watch how their enthusiasm increases if they get other willing and interested helpers.

I’m sure most parents would agree that raising great kids does have it’s tricky moments, but sometimes it can be as simple as building sandcastles.

It’s not just the sand that kids love

Of course, kids have plenty of fun in the water at the beach as well.  I’ve written an article about Raising Great Kids and Going to the Beach on ezine – click on raising great kids if you’d like to read it.

Raising Great Kids – Safety Comes First

Of course the beach can be a dangerous place and parents need to be particularly careful when they are there with children.   The water, the sun and even the sand can be dangerous, so take all necessary safety precautions.  In Australia it’s always a good idea to swim and play between the flags.

Do you go to the beach with your children?  Do you  build sandcastles?  I’d love to hear about it.

Thanks for reading.

Jan Littlehales

Tweet

Share

Save

I’ve just returned from a 3 weeks holiday with my family in the Lake District, in the North West of England (where I’m originally from).  Walking is something my husband and I have done with our boys since they were very young.  Now, aged 18 and 15, they are as eager as ever to come on walking holidays with us and will happily hike up any mountain we suggest – the steeper the better, as far as my 18 year old is concerned.

Spending quality time walking with your children is one of the best ways I know of raising great kids.  It’s a real pleasure to get out in the fresh air (sometimes a bit too fresh in England), admire the fabulous scenery and spend hours of time together.  There’s really nothing like it and I recommend it to all parents who are keen walkers.  Even if you’re not a walker yet, you might get to love it if you give it a try.

You don’t have to climb mountains

While raising great kids, quality time together can be as easy as a walk on the beach.  Slip off your shoes, walk along the water’s edge,  feel the water between your toes and the wind in your hair.  Check out your local area and see if there are any local foot paths and walk-ways.  Are there any national parks in your area?

Having lived in Sydney for almost 18 years, I think we have walked almost every harbour, bush and beach walk with our boys.  Even now, if we are heading into the City at the weekend to visit museums, markets or gardens, we will park the car on the south side of the harbour and walk over Sydney Harbour Bridge to our distination. Walking back over the Bridge at sunset is an experience not to be missed.

Total Cost – Zero

One of the great things about walking is that it’s free.  If you pack a delicious picnic for lunch, eaten away from crowds and queues, a day spent with your children will cost you very little.

Don’t walk in Ugg Boots

You wouldn’t wear slippers to play football or wear ski boots when you cycle, but you’d be surprised how may walkers wear totally inappropriate footwear  while walking.  Just last week in a UK newspaper there was an article about walkers twisting ankles and having to be rescued (at great expense) because they were hiking in Ugg Boots.  I’ve seen children walking in the Blue Mountains (2 hours drive from Sydney) in thongs – that’s flip-flops by the way, not the other type of thong.

If you’re planning walking and raising great kids think about what is appropriate footwear for the type of walk you are planning.  Hiking boots that give proper ankle support are best for walking in the mountains; walking/running shoes might be more suitable for flat walks.  If your children have sore feet at the end of the day because of wearing inappropriate footwear, they are unlikely to want to go walking with you again.

Added Bonus

Of course, you wont just have lots of fun walking together as a family, you’ll also get fit if you do it regularly.  Walking – just one more way of raising great kids.

Final Photo (I can’t resist)

Please send me your thoughts about walking with your kids.   Just fill in the box below or click on the word Comments.

Tweet

Share

2 saves

Most parents will have seen the effects unhealthy food can have on their children.  Just think about the party they went to, where they ate sausage rolls, party pies, donuts, potato chips and cheap lollies, all swilled down with an endless supply of fizzy soft drink.  Did your child come home hyper-active, cranky and rude? or maybe dazed and half asleep?  Foods filled with preservatives, colorings, food enhancers and other nasty things can have that effect on children – and it’s frightening.

Develop Healthy Eating Habits from an Early Age

While raising great kids I’m convinced that developing healthy eating habits from an early age is crucial.  The most obvious benefit is health, but it’s more than that.  If healthy eating habits are established in childhood, there’s a good chance those habits will stay with them for life.  As they become adults themselves they will hopefully then pass on similar healthy eating habits to their own children.

Behaviour at School

Out of control and bad behaviour at school can sometimes be linked to a child’s diet.  In Australia, school canteens now have strict guidelines about what they can and can’t sell.  I think similar rules exist in other countries.  If your child takes a packed lunch, make sure it’s filled with delicious healthy options – like their favourite fruit and tasty wholemeal sandwiches.  Avoid packets of potato chips, biscuits, fizzy drinks and lollies.  Homemade muffins can be much healthier than bought ones and make a tasty treat.

The Cost of Eating Healthy Food while Raising Great Kids

I’ve heard people say they can’t afford to eat healthily, but I can’t agree with this.  The cost of raw ingredients can be relatively cheap when compared with ready made packaged food and take-aways.  There are many pasta, rice and noodle dishes that can be made at home quickly and cheaply.  What are your thoughts?

What if I Can’t Cook

There is a wealth of free information available on the web about cooking – preparing a family meal doesn’t have to take hours or be complicated.  There are plenty of recipes where you can prepare dinner in ten minutes.   Dinner in Ten Minutes is a good place to start.  Have a browse on line and see what you can find – and look for recipes that only have around 6 ingredients of less to start off with, to keep it simple.

Things That Have Helped Me

• Always have a good selection of fresh fruit available in the house
• On outings, take a tasty packed lunch
• When driving long distance, pack delicious healthy foods to eat on the way
• When time permits, bake your own cakes and biscuits
• Fresh fruit juice, not fizzy drinks
• Make healthy smoothies
• Get in the habit of drinking water with meals
• Make double quantities and freeze half for another day
• Always start the day with a healthy breakfast
• Eat meals at the dining table
• Get your children involved and teach them how to cook and bake

Educate your Children from an Early Age

From an early age we talked with our boys about the benefits of eating good food – and the consequences of continually eating rubbish.  That’s not to say you can’t enjoy chocolate, ice-cream and take-away pizza now and again.  But everything in moderation.  My 18 year old boy continues to be a healthy eater of his own choice now – and I couldn’t be happier.

So What are Your Thoughts?

What has been your experience while raising great kids?  I look forward to your comments and hope you’ve enjoyed reading another Raising Great Kids post.

Tweet

Share

2 saves

Raising great kids doesn’t have to stop at home!

Allow me to introduce you to Lucy.  She’s 5 years old, lives in Zambia and has known little but poverty in her young life.  Both Lucy’s parents are alive, but the family has no proper source of income.

They have had to resort to peasant farming but still cannot make ends meet.  They live in a mud-grass house.  Without the help of charities they would have limited access to education, health care, food and clean water.

Their life is similar to thousands of others who live in the region.

How can we help Raising Great Kids like Lucy?

Charities such as Child Fund Australia and World Vision enable more fortunate families around the world to sponsor children like Lucy.  Sponsorship enables these charities to provide what most of us take for granted – education, health, nutrition, sanitation, income generation and community services – to communities like the one Lucy lives in.

Just as raising great kids is important to most loving parents, it’s also important to Lucy’s parents.  Through the help of Child Fund Australia and its sponsors, Lucy’s parents can devote more time and energy to raising great kids and not worry about the basic needs of survival that many of us take for granted.

Sponsor a Child Today

So why not sponsor a child today and help raising great kids like Lucy.  Maybe you already sponsor a child?  Or have you thought about it for ages but not got around to doing it (I know I did that for some time).

As always, I love to read your comments… and let me know if there’s any particular raising great kids topic you’re passionate about.

Jan Littlehales

Tweet

Share

1 save